Great line from class last week

I have a class this semester in leadership and learning. We examine the connection between the two and how we, as supervisors/leaders/advisers, can facilitate resiliency and leadership among those we interact with.

We've been talking a lot about conflict lately, since it's an integral part of any sort of team environment. And I will be the first to say that I'm not a fan of conflict. Of course, most folks don't actually enjoy conflict, but after reflection and reading, I see that I connect conflict to emotional responses. I'm fine mediating conflict between others but when it comes to my own, i would much rather avoid or squash it than have those difficult conversations. Something my professor said last week has really been resonating with me.

"Having your say does not mean getting your way"

For the last few years I have seen a remarkable increase in people thinking this way. Mostly students who are accustomed to "helicopter parent" phenomenon where all of their needs and wants are taken care of just my mentioning it to mom and dad. But I am also seeing this more and more in new professionals. People who think that just because they have said what they want or feel like they are right, they should get what they want. There seems to be a HUGE lack in compromise, sacrifice and willingness to take personal responsibility. It's incredibly frustrating to me, as a person who craves independence and places a pretty high value on competence.

Are we doing anyone justice by continuing to reward this behavior? The flipside would say that in order for people to feel valued and connected, we need to communicate with them in the way that they will respond to. My approach and that approach seem to be the extremes. There has to be a developmental approach in the middle that would cultivate personal responsibility but also acknowledge the approach of the newbies.

Hmm...